Dee In A Nutshell

Feed Me, Love Me, Never Leave Me.


Monstrous Ear Ache.

I don’t know if I have ever actually told you about my job. It is mindnumbing work and I keep telling people that if it weren’t for my access to the internet, I would be regressing. This, however, is not the reason I am posting.
I work with all kinds of people, which is expected. I, however cannot stand cry babies especially if these cry babies are men. There is this guy who works with us who just goes out of his way to piss me off. I don’t want to sound mean but when I get sick I stay home or I come to work and deal with it without whining. Some time back this guy, let’s call him SK came to work sick and made a big deal out of it, it seems all he had was a headache but I would be forgiven for thinking he had ebola. If anyone asked him for anything he would say, “can’t you see I am sick?” Since I have never been one to enable anyone I told him if he was too sick to work he should have stayed home. This wasn’t the worst of it though. The past couple of days he has had an ear ache, his ear is hurting. So yesterday he is standing two feet away from something he doesn’t want to get up and pick up so do you know what he says to me when I tell him to get up and do it himself? He says, and I quote, “No, you help me. Don’t you know my ear is paining?” I thought I had heard wrong, I was thinking you little motherfucking wanker!! I was at a loss for words, I mean seriously people what do you say to something like that? “Oh poor baby, your ear? You can’t possibly do anything because your ear is just getting in the way of a sound mind. Sit back, relax, let me take care of it for you. God forbid you actually had something seriously wrong with you, we woul dnot know how to handle that but an ear, well that is just my specialty, today is your lucky day.” I wanted to pummel him preferably his knees so that he would actually have something to complain about and an actual reason not to stand up.
Enough ranting. I gotta get back to work.




No, not fity cent and if you don’t have a speech impediment, fifty cent. I just realised this is my 50th post yet I have been blogging since November 2004. I am mostly a very lazy writer but having access to a PC with internet all the time has helped me improve.
Remember my tentative plans for the weekend, I didn’t do any of the things I said I might do. My boss kept me here late on Saturday so I didn’t go watch goats race and I din’t go to Jinja for my much needed weekend get away. In short, my weekend sucked; hard.
I am back at work, not refreshed at all after my one day off a week. Will post when I have something to say.


Of things.

So some unreliable sources tell me that the lady in Mafikizolo is sick and other also unreliable sources say she is pregnant; both sources agree that they probably won’t make it down here for their show scheduled for Saturday. Some more reliable sources tell me that J. Kazoora, the man behind the show is leaving the country today. As a result of these bits of disturbing news, it looks like I won’t be watching the show with my Mom and Alfie anytime soon or… at all. I guess I will have to arrange a conventional meet-the-parents type thing. This is hard because there is no distractions in case there are uncomfortable silences. Alfie, I know you are reading this so, don’t worry, I will work something out.
Since I am not going to watch the show I have made other plans. I am going to the Royal Ascot Goat Race on Saturday with Alfie without my mother. We are then going to Jinja for the weekend where I hope to bungee jump. These plans are tentative so if I come back here on Monday and say I did none of these things do not, I repeat, DO NOT BE SURPRISED!!!
I have just come back from a wonderful lunch. Alfie came (late) picked me up and took me for lunch. Let me divert from the topic at hand for a moment. I am going to assume that you have all been in the first stages of a relationship, the novelty of it all is enough to make your stomach turn (in a good way) everytime you think about it. If you truly care for the person, the thought of them just makes you smile. I was chatting with Alfie online and I was smiling the whole time and the whole time I looked like an idiot coz it looked like I was smiling at myself. So I beg your permission to gush over it while I still can before the fights and the madness take over. As I was saying, it was short but wonderful and I got a present out of it: a perfume. I love perfume.
As for Savage and Dante, you asked for it. More of me means more of this puketastic delirious giddiness. You will soon be wishing for more PB and less me.



The last time I posted, like really posted was Saturday and I was excitedly waiting to watch Mafikizolo with Alfie and my Mom. Those of you in the know know that Mafikizolo missed their flight and thus there was no show thus no meeting between Alfie and The Mother (this is how I shall refer to her, real name Phoebe). So anyway, The Red Pepper broke the story and since they have a history of making stuff up I chose not to believe. Seriously, those Pepper guys said some girl died in the Tsunami and I met her about three Thursdays ago, far from dead. I went to the saloon to get my hair did and then I call my friend and she tells me she went to get advance tickets and the guy said the show was cancelled. I listen to Kazoora, who was the guy in charge, and he says, on his radio programme, that they will be here this week and the show will be there this Saturday. I am excitedly waiting once again.

On Sunday, I went and visited my old primary school, Kitante Primary School. I hadn’t been there in 10, count them, TEN years. Jay, you were right. I felt enormous. I remember the school being bigger. I loved it, I loved being there, they were some of the best years of my life. It was surreal being back there.

Monday, came to work, had the worst case of the blues, came to work on Tuesday, same old, same old and now it’s Wednesday. Savage, this should suffice as an update on me.

P.s. I know I promised not to bore you with my giddy, ecstatic state of mind but I am sorry, I lied. I am so happy right now. More later.